I thought it might be fun to offer up a few samples of ArtSpeak and then translate them for your edification:
HOW ORIGINAL! = ( I've never seen this level of crap before.)
HIS USE OF SPACE IS EYE-POPPING! = ( He ran out of canvas.)
HIS COLOR CHOICES ARE UNBELIEVABLE! = ( Is that puke green or baby shit yellow?)
WHAT A SURPRISING TALENT! = ( I thought he parked cars at the Cheese Factory.)
WHEN YOU EXAMINE THE SUB-CONTEXT OF HIS NARRATIVE WORK, YOU'LL SOON DISCOVER THE DEPTH OF HIS EXPRESSION IS BASED ON NON-LINEAR VISUAL CUES. =
( This zinfindel isn't bad.)
Okay, now....get out there and support your local art scene!