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Comments (22)

"You better be more generous on the tip this time."


“The 72 Virgins Burger is off the menu”

will you be having the jihad sah-lad once again, sir?

El Jefe:

"That's a Jack Daniels on the rocks and the baby-back ribs, right?"

Mr Michael:

Yeah, yeah, I'm one of your 72 Virgins alright... and in order for me to RETAIN that status, Allah says ya gotta stick to ordering what's on the menu. Got it? Awright. Now... soup or salad?


"No, they're not goat ears, why?"


"Wings I can getcha--but a voijin dackery iz 'bout da best weez kin do."


"Lissen, toots...I duzzint keah wheddah yooz tinks d' eahs 'n d' tail iz bleahsfimus...yooz kin go tuh Hootaz fuh alls I keah."


"Lissen buddy--weez don't do hummus heah...dis iz a respectable jeirnt."


"Yeah, Osama, what happens in Dubai, stays in Dubai. Now, will that be straight up or on the rocks?"


"Yooz talks like yoo's gots a haeh bawl da size'o my tail."


"Yuh bettah not let da bownsah catch ya wit d' tablecloath owahn yuh noggin."

red collar:

"All right, dad.
You were right.
They didn't let me
"tone down" the uniform...
Now quit gloating."


"I give up, mistah. Whut iz Sis Boom Bah?"

"I've nevah hoid of wings bein' huhmedikly sealed an' kept in a numbuh tooh maynaise jah on...whut wuz dat yuh cawled it...a funkin' wig nails poatch?."

"Mistah Carnac, I tinks dat d' ploomz haz dun fallin off'n yuh toibin n' gots stuck tuh yuh chops. Kin I bringz yuhz a wet nap?"

BTW..."Sis Boom Bah" is the sound made when a sheep explodes.


"I'm sorry daddy. My burka is at the cleaners. You always said you liked this outfit when I wore it for you at home."


"Mekka-lekka hi mekka hiney ho!
Mekka-lekka hi mekka chahney ho!
Mola-mekka chala mekka hola hayla hey!"


"Your order is granted."


Do that again, and I'll have your hand cut off.


"I was like...an' he went...then she goes...an' it was like...WELL--if you like wanna like stone me like to death, you're just gonna like have to like stand in line."


No sir, you can't bring your own cheese. And frankly, keeping it over your head is quite disgusting.

"Yeah, yeah....."dirka dirka mohammed jihad dirka dirka" to you, too, pal."


"Geeziz, Akmed...wuz dat'cha owuduh, oah didja jus' hawek d' Muthuh uv awl Loogies?"


John Cox is a painter, cartoonist, and illustrator for hire. For information about purchasing existing work or commissioning new work, contact him by e-mail at john555cox [at] hotmail.com.

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This page contains a single entry from the blog posted on December 16, 2007 5:33 PM.

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