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Posted on March 24, 2009 3:29 PM
Before Joey's Dad vaporized, he remembers him saying "This machine will allow any citizen to peer into the mind of any politician and yet, escape unscathed."
March 24, 2009 6:03 PM
March 24, 2009 18:03
What would be the need for a machine to explore the inside of a vacuum? ( :
March 24, 2009 10:27 PM
March 24, 2009 22:27
Back in college, a particular misguided genius that lived next to me took apart a TI calculator down to the last chip to see if he could put it back together. Spent several days, missed a few important tests and several classes. I think he eventually flunked out with A's in math and physics and F's in everything else because he didn't go.
He's the one wearing the hat.
March 24, 2009 11:14 PM
March 24, 2009 23:14
Do you know the "legend" about George Dantzig? Either he was bored with a lecture & fell asleep during class to wake up to what he thought was his homework assignment--or he showed up late for class.
During the course of that day's lecture, the professor discussed what he believed to be two "unsolvable" statistics problems, & he scrawled them on the board in the course of that day's lecture as he discussed the issues that made the variables in the problems "impossible to manage."
Thinking they were a homework assignment, Dantzig copied them down, solved them, & turned them in.
He was later brought in by the Pentagon to develop a state-of-the-art logistics system...
...in spite of the fact that he had failed to pay $859 in income taxes because he had been flummoxed by "ENIAC-Tax." (Now that's funny right there--I don't care who you are.)
March 25, 2009 2:17 AM
March 25, 2009 02:17
Even the people who write the tax code can't seem to be able to follow it.
March 25, 2009 11:20 AM
March 25, 2009 11:20
You're right, but I was referring to Geithner. The guy who is supposed to be managing our entire country's finances (including the enforcement of finance laws & the supervision of banks) was too confusterated to use a "plug & chug" idjit utility (I know that "It was TurboTax's fault" was a bald-faced lie--just pointing out the irony between requisite qualifications & perceived ability).
I can remember working on one of my returns in the early 90s. Form 1040 (the long form). I get to line 17 (I really don't remember what line it was) & the directions on the form read, "to calculate line 17, turn to page 26 [in this book]". I turn to page 26, & there's a mini-form that starts off, "enter the amount from line 17."
Unlike Geithner, I've never underpaid my taxes. I seem to miss a few hundred dollars in deductions every now & then, but that cost is cheaper than what I'd pay a "pro". Besides--I like to do my own taxes so that I stay good & mad at the IRS--& that little cushion is worth every penny should they ever attempt to get me with one of those "scorched earth" audits.
March 26, 2009 1:29 AM
March 26, 2009 01:29
John Cox is a painter, cartoonist, and illustrator for hire. For information about purchasing existing work or commissioning new work, contact him by e-mail at john555cox [at] hotmail.com.
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